The greatest rock band. ever.

Here's a little tidbit for you: How to create a great rock band.

First: You must identify the key elements that have to be present. You will need a singer, definitely a drummer, and a guitarist and bassist of some kind. Other rock bands have included keyboards, other percussion, saxophones and other horns, more than one guitarist, even more than one singer. It is up to you to decide. I'll run through all the possibilities here just to cover the bases.

Then you've got to get the whole band to gel together and have a unity that drives them not to just play these really amazingly written notes but to make music with each other - something alive and intangible and greater than the sum of the parts - something so elusive that only a dozen bands in a generation ever acheive it and it can't be measured in record sales or money earned although it almost always leads to those things. This is also paramount because when the band works together well they can write together well. A lead singer can't tell a guitarist what to play and expect it to be a very good guitar part. And the guitarist can't write his own part that might be very good unless he knows that it will fit with what the lead singer is doing. And the bassist and drummer are equally dependent on the others. So you want a band that can write an intricate and musical piece together in order to make a great song. James Hetfield is not the best singer in the world, Lars Ulrich is not the best drummer, Kirk Hammet is not the best guitarist, and they've been through three bassists, some better than others. But they were all near the top of their craft, and the writing was incredible in almost all of their songs. That is what makes them something that no one else could ever acheive. It's not hard to be a Metallica cover band and play the songs once they have been written - some talented people could definitely do that (Dream Theater, for example, once played through an entire Metallica album live on stage note-for-note). But to be the original Metallica is impossible for anyone else - because together they created something untoppable. They are the utmost example of this phenomenon that I can think of.

Ok so I'm not going to deal with keyboards and horns and other musicians right now. Heck you could have a violinist if you want. It's your thing, people - I've got you started, now you've got to finish the rock with your own personal style. But whatever you do, you've got to rock. Please America, we need rock 'n' roll.

The Voice

First the singer. Or perhaps last - chosen to fit in with the style of music setup by the other musicians. But I think that in its formative years, the lead singer clearly defines the nature of the band, and even if they eventually leave they will have left their mark on the other band members. Just ask Audioslave who used to be Rage Against the Machine before Zach de la Rocha left - and now look at how their music has changed from working with Chris Cornell instead.

So I say choose the singer first. It must be someone with a distinctive voice capable of expressing exactly the emotions you want expressed. You don't want someone who simply can sing well, or has a good voice. You want someone who can accent that singing with soaring heart-wrenching high notes, husky sultry staccato, deep angry growls, or wailing screams. You want someone who will sing his songs in a way that no one else can quite re-create - who goes beyond the notes and captures something no one else saw in the music until he showed it to them. This is actually the kind of thing that you want from each musician but especially from the singer. You also definitely want the singer to write his own lyrics and melodies. You want someone who has not just a single cause that they are always on about but a lot of passion for a variety of topics - someone who can express their worldview from many angles with great emphasis. For example, you don't want Zach de la Rocha who left the band because he couldn't think about anything but leftist extremist politics and that's what all their songs were about - though they were good, it wasn't meant to last and I think it limited the band. You want someone like a Chris Cornell or James Hetfield or Robert Plant or Roger Daltry.

Axe Men

Ok guitarists - you need again someone not afraid to be an absolute pioneer and really take charge of things and be the center of attention a lot of the time - but don't take away from what the lead singer is doing. They should also be able to provide backup vocals...if you really care. But they need to know all the tricks - arpeggios, whammy bars, pinch harmonics, sweep picking, feedback, distortion, all sorts of things. You need a Guitar Hero. If you can get an amazing "guitar god" like one of the ones in my previous post, great - although I'll warn you that Yngwie does not "play well with others" - he's notorious for having an ego bigger than any band can handle. Guitarists who have played well in the context of their band while still expanding their art form includ Jimmy Page, Tom Morello, Kirk Hammet, oh the list goes on and on I don't even want to try to get started. You want someone who can take the above mentioned tricks of the trade (pretty standard fare these days) and add something new to them, but something that fits in the song.

Rhythm Section

Bassists and drummers need to have similar characteristics, and I know a lot about bass playing and very little about drum playing but here's the deal. They need to be comfortable backing up the band. I've agonized over this as a bass player and for awhile I rebelled against this idea and wanted to have a band like Rush where the bass played a much more significant role and if that can happen then it can be great and unique but I've realized now that a bass player can back up a band AND be an amazing technical player that really stands out in his own right. Listen to Red Hot Chili Peppers - Flea rarely solos and never overshadows what is happening musically - he and Chad are the two tightest rhythm players in current radio rotation - shut up and put your hands down. But Flea's talent is immensely obvious - he plays within the established chord structure and maintains a tight groove but he ornaments it and speaks within it with such feeling and talent that it changes the whole face of the song - someone just playing a standard walking bassline under that stuff would leave the song dull and uninteresting. And Chad's flawless funk drumming does exactly the same thing. Keith Moon and John Entwistle from the Who (both deceased, unfortunately) were another great combination. You never notice them if you're not listening for them, but once you do listen for them - wow you'll never ignore them again. John Paul Jones and Bonzo from Zeppelin. Whoever and whoever from Galactic - this great funk/jazz fusion band that no one has ever heard of but I used to play them on the radio in college and I love them.