I have a secret I'm not telling

I got engaged just over a week ago! I know that I've said this before on the blog, and it was definitely a big hoaxy lie that time, but this time it's for real - and I have pictures to prove it! You don't kiss your sister like that...and if you'll look on the left hand of the lovely lady you can clearly see a classy, tasteful white gold ring which contains, in a Tiffany setting, a .31 carat princess cut diamond, H color, SI1 clarity.

Donna had been my girlfriend for 316 days on October 19th when I took her out to dinner at Maggiano's Little Italy in Richmond. After a lovely meal of various-things-parmigiana and a bottle of our favorite wine the waiter suggested that we get a table downstairs to enjoy some live jazz they had in the bar that evening. We agreed and he reserved us a table near to the piano, but intimately separated from the bustle of the rest of the bar. As we sat down and ordered dessert the piano player sat down at the black baby grand and started playing our song. After I sang the first verse to her (because she did look wonderful that night), the lights in the room dimmed, and I got down on one knee, opened the black velvet box, and asked her, "will you marry me?"

I can't tell you how nervous I was up to the point that I asked that question, but strangely once it was out I knew how she would answer, and she did - covering her face with her hands and nodding vigorously before squeaking out a delighted "yes!" and crying gently as I stood and kissed her, slipping the ring onto her lovely finger. Our dessert came and the waiters and piano player congratulated us. They also didn't charge us for dessert, though what I tipped the pianist (who had learned the song just that day just for us) was worth more than the tiramisu and cheesecake combined!

After we finished eating and drank the rest of our wine we headed home to call and tell everyone our news, after which we stopped off at my sister's house where she took some lovely pictures of us together. She didn't e-mail me the one that focuses on the ring but if you give me a second I will try to dig it up...Here you go:

Well that was about it for that night - but two days later she helped me host a houswarming party at my new house, which will be the subject of my next post (as soon as I get some pictures). Yup it's been a week of God's blessings! Now I just have to plan a wedding...

The greatest rock band. ever.

Here's a little tidbit for you: How to create a great rock band.

First: You must identify the key elements that have to be present. You will need a singer, definitely a drummer, and a guitarist and bassist of some kind. Other rock bands have included keyboards, other percussion, saxophones and other horns, more than one guitarist, even more than one singer. It is up to you to decide. I'll run through all the possibilities here just to cover the bases.

Then you've got to get the whole band to gel together and have a unity that drives them not to just play these really amazingly written notes but to make music with each other - something alive and intangible and greater than the sum of the parts - something so elusive that only a dozen bands in a generation ever acheive it and it can't be measured in record sales or money earned although it almost always leads to those things. This is also paramount because when the band works together well they can write together well. A lead singer can't tell a guitarist what to play and expect it to be a very good guitar part. And the guitarist can't write his own part that might be very good unless he knows that it will fit with what the lead singer is doing. And the bassist and drummer are equally dependent on the others. So you want a band that can write an intricate and musical piece together in order to make a great song. James Hetfield is not the best singer in the world, Lars Ulrich is not the best drummer, Kirk Hammet is not the best guitarist, and they've been through three bassists, some better than others. But they were all near the top of their craft, and the writing was incredible in almost all of their songs. That is what makes them something that no one else could ever acheive. It's not hard to be a Metallica cover band and play the songs once they have been written - some talented people could definitely do that (Dream Theater, for example, once played through an entire Metallica album live on stage note-for-note). But to be the original Metallica is impossible for anyone else - because together they created something untoppable. They are the utmost example of this phenomenon that I can think of.

Ok so I'm not going to deal with keyboards and horns and other musicians right now. Heck you could have a violinist if you want. It's your thing, people - I've got you started, now you've got to finish the rock with your own personal style. But whatever you do, you've got to rock. Please America, we need rock 'n' roll.

The Voice

First the singer. Or perhaps last - chosen to fit in with the style of music setup by the other musicians. But I think that in its formative years, the lead singer clearly defines the nature of the band, and even if they eventually leave they will have left their mark on the other band members. Just ask Audioslave who used to be Rage Against the Machine before Zach de la Rocha left - and now look at how their music has changed from working with Chris Cornell instead.

So I say choose the singer first. It must be someone with a distinctive voice capable of expressing exactly the emotions you want expressed. You don't want someone who simply can sing well, or has a good voice. You want someone who can accent that singing with soaring heart-wrenching high notes, husky sultry staccato, deep angry growls, or wailing screams. You want someone who will sing his songs in a way that no one else can quite re-create - who goes beyond the notes and captures something no one else saw in the music until he showed it to them. This is actually the kind of thing that you want from each musician but especially from the singer. You also definitely want the singer to write his own lyrics and melodies. You want someone who has not just a single cause that they are always on about but a lot of passion for a variety of topics - someone who can express their worldview from many angles with great emphasis. For example, you don't want Zach de la Rocha who left the band because he couldn't think about anything but leftist extremist politics and that's what all their songs were about - though they were good, it wasn't meant to last and I think it limited the band. You want someone like a Chris Cornell or James Hetfield or Robert Plant or Roger Daltry.

Axe Men

Ok guitarists - you need again someone not afraid to be an absolute pioneer and really take charge of things and be the center of attention a lot of the time - but don't take away from what the lead singer is doing. They should also be able to provide backup vocals...if you really care. But they need to know all the tricks - arpeggios, whammy bars, pinch harmonics, sweep picking, feedback, distortion, all sorts of things. You need a Guitar Hero. If you can get an amazing "guitar god" like one of the ones in my previous post, great - although I'll warn you that Yngwie does not "play well with others" - he's notorious for having an ego bigger than any band can handle. Guitarists who have played well in the context of their band while still expanding their art form includ Jimmy Page, Tom Morello, Kirk Hammet, oh the list goes on and on I don't even want to try to get started. You want someone who can take the above mentioned tricks of the trade (pretty standard fare these days) and add something new to them, but something that fits in the song.

Rhythm Section

Bassists and drummers need to have similar characteristics, and I know a lot about bass playing and very little about drum playing but here's the deal. They need to be comfortable backing up the band. I've agonized over this as a bass player and for awhile I rebelled against this idea and wanted to have a band like Rush where the bass played a much more significant role and if that can happen then it can be great and unique but I've realized now that a bass player can back up a band AND be an amazing technical player that really stands out in his own right. Listen to Red Hot Chili Peppers - Flea rarely solos and never overshadows what is happening musically - he and Chad are the two tightest rhythm players in current radio rotation - shut up and put your hands down. But Flea's talent is immensely obvious - he plays within the established chord structure and maintains a tight groove but he ornaments it and speaks within it with such feeling and talent that it changes the whole face of the song - someone just playing a standard walking bassline under that stuff would leave the song dull and uninteresting. And Chad's flawless funk drumming does exactly the same thing. Keith Moon and John Entwistle from the Who (both deceased, unfortunately) were another great combination. You never notice them if you're not listening for them, but once you do listen for them - wow you'll never ignore them again. John Paul Jones and Bonzo from Zeppelin. Whoever and whoever from Galactic - this great funk/jazz fusion band that no one has ever heard of but I used to play them on the radio in college and I love them.

Happy Birthday

Some Bullets (long bullets, like rifle bullet size)

*I have a new niece - her mother has not yet updated the baby blog but she is adorable with dark skin and dark hair and long clutching fingers and toes and she squints and I've only ever seen her eyes twice but she is the most beautiful baby ever. Her older brother (14 months older) is absolutely sweet to her and at the same time is learning quite about himself about being obedient - I hope my kids turn out as well!

*I turned 25 and it feels a lot older and more mature than previous milestones - I'm headed on a crash course towards home ownership as well as marriage and I'm starting a third year in a great job - all evidence of God's blessing me and maturing me whether I like it or not. Saw a great Phil Keaggy concert on my birthday and received many wonderful gifts - CDs, a new Bible, a set of golf clubs (left-handed!) a mirror for my new house, a Target gift card, and assorted and sundry monies

*The house: June-July was house hunting - I would receive e-mail alerts when a house came on the market that matched certain specified criteria, and from those I would choose which ones to go and visit in person. My agent would get me in the houses and we would look around and I really wasn't knocked off my feet by any of them. There were many that my girlfriend and I lobbied back and forth on, trying to weigh the pros and cons, until she found one that I had overlooked and when we went to see it it met up to a lot of our expectations. So now I've signed a contract to close on September 12th on a 960 sq. ft. rancher on Sawston Road in Richmond. The carpet needs to be replaced and it needs new appliances, as well as a few small repairs to make it liveable, but my gf has definitely sunk her teeth into decoration and it's rubbed off on me. We registered at Target (under a baby registry, there is no housewarming registry) and we were very excited planning all the color schemes for bedding, linens, bathroom accessories, kitchen utensils, etc. What a fun day!

*The girlfriend: Drew Barrymore and I are doing fine and now that we've had two children together we're going to get married in Tahiti and honeymoon in Des Moines...ok my real girlfriend is going to kill me for saying that but I just had to. Donna and I felt the Lord's strengthening hand on our relationship while we spent the summer very close to one another, a feature our relationship had not enjoyed for the first five months, nor will it again until she graduates college in June. We are back now to the hard work of the long-distance routine but knowing what is waiting for us when we get together makes it so much more worth it. We learned how to fight and grow and love...and let's be honest I just LOVE kissing her. Daily thanks are offered to the Lord for the blessing we both experience - His love poured out to each of us through the other.

*The job: teaching Physics and Engineering Design at L.C. Bird High School in Chesterfield County - a daily opportunity to practice the philosophy that drives this blog and share the workings of God's wondrous world with (hopefully) curious students. Teacher work week is going well and I'm getting a lot done - as long as I can just figure out what to do with that first day...I'm re-vamping a lot of procedures to make each unit more standardized to provide consistency, whereas in the past I've changed the presentation to fit the content, I think my students will retain information better if it's presented to them in regular doses. I'm also upping the ante on disciplinary issues, and the school's new tighter tardy policy is going to help that as well. But I've already got a double-handful of office referrals and detention notices in my top desk drawer, so bring it on!

*Been reading a biography of Albert Einstein along with Douglas Adams entire five-book Hitchhiker's Guide trilogy - all five in a leather-bound gilt-edged volume with one of those ribbon bookmarks - I don't know if he's trying to make it look like a bible, but it does! Musically my tastes continue to expand, though slowly - picked up a few new soundtracks, one orchestral one very eclectic world-music-ish, the Thomas Crown Affair - Sinnerman is undoubtedly my favorite track. Movies have slowed due to cash flow being crunched in favor of buying a house, but I couldn't resist Talladega Nights and I also traveled two hours north to catch A Scanner Darkly, both of which are on my trophy list although for completely different reasons. One is just an unstoppably funny comedy, the other an artistically philosophical look at drug use and loss of identity.

*That's it for now, mom's making homemade pizza for dinner and I've gotta go!

PostScript

Don't read this until you've read "40 minute education", but...

ps - I'm going to see Phil Keaggy live in concert tomorrow night!

Happy Birthday to me!